Interventions

[eruthros]

So I was having one of those conversations you have with fannish friends. You know. thingswithwings was telling me a story idea, and she said, god, what am I even doing, somebody's gonna stage an intervention any day now. And I, of course, pointed out that this was Stargate: Atlantis, and that you probably couldn't get an intervention for anything less than "the story in which Rodney and John sit in the office all day without talking to each other and just do paperwork," and perhaps not even then.

So, guys, what does it take to get an intervention in SGA? How far do you have to go?

Like, imagine your fannish friend who's been with you for the last three fandoms. You even bailed out of the X-Files at the same time! It has been so wonderful and lovely. But now she's gone a little bit off the rails in this wild and crazy SGA fandom.

[Poll #1090767]

Comments

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

and yet, just above, I have demonstrated my ignorance of radiohead! I shame the nineties.

if you really wanted to callback to songfic, you should've said Sarah McLaughlin or Celine Dion or something. Remember that Spike/Xander fic where Xander was a secret cutter and always lit candles and spread out black silk before cutting his thighs and listening to Sarah McLaughlin's Surfacing? Because I DO.

(we should start a new community like sga_storyfinders, only it should be rememberthe90s_storyfinders or something, so people can be like, what was that x-files fic where Mulder and Scully were kept in an egg for a year and Mulder was forced to rape Scully to impregnate her and they kept hearing windchimes? or like, what was the due South fic where RayK was still getting beaten by his dad at 30-whatever years old and Fraser saves him and then they have healing sex? and then we can all be ruefully amused.)

[eruthros]

CLEARLY IT MUST BE DONE.

I mean, how else will I be able to point people to the X-Files story where Krycek's a mute mermaid with sharp teeth? Or where Scully hires somebody to rape Krycek to get him out of Mulder's life? Without googling, I mean, which seems like work.

Man, I totally should've said Sarah McLaughlin, but I have blocked out that part of fandom. I pretend it didn't even happen in dS canon, and that takes some doing. (REALLY black silk? REALLY?)

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

hires someone to rape him, REALLY?

and, as if you forced me to find that fic for you. Alexandria Brown, baby: Waiting Here (http://www.abfic.com/waitinghere.html). I lied about the Surfacing; it seems as if the song in question is NIN's "Hurt," which, actually, that's almost worse. Perhaps I am conflating TWO Xander-is-a-secret-cutter fics? BUT I am not lying about the black silk. It's also one of the Xander's-dad-rapes-him fics, which, yeah.

[eruthros]

YES really. It was part of this hugemongous multi-part series, possibly centered around Mulder and Krycek meeting at a cabin? And Mulder would be all "but I LOVE him, Scully!" and then she'd say "but how can you TRUST him?" and then eventually she hired said rapist and then told Krycek she'd tell Mulder that Krycek'd been cheating, see. Or something. So Krycek ran away and Mulder was sad. Fortunately, there were approximately 100 stories left in the series to fix that.

[mecurtin.livejournal.com]

the X-Files story where Krycek's a mute mermaid with sharp teeth

I didn't know you were mocking something that existed -- because as an SGA AU, that would totally work. Actually, each member of the Team could plausibly be a mute mermaid with sharp teeth, each in a different way:

- cranky genius mute mermaid with sign language almost too fast to follow

- mermaid mute with PTSD from years on the run swim

- mute mermaid who swims expressively (but can still kick your ass)

- laid-back kinda dorky mute mermaid who turns vicious when his marine biologist is threatened.

[eruthros]

*g* I'm pretty sure that it's the cracked-out x-files story, because I see it mentioned fairly frequently. It's called "A Fish Called Krycek." The real point here is that "mute" was meant to mean "almost totally incapable of communication with our hero." Mulder thinks of him throughout the story as "his pet" and says they don't know whether he's intelligent or a "dumb fish." Also, he masturbates to wildlife documentaries on mermen instead of porn. If anybody's read it more recently than I have, they could probably tell you whether there's any definitive sign of sentience at any point on the series (yes, series).

ALSO, I think that the laid-back kinda dorky mute mermaid story = teh awesome.

[mecurtin.livejournal.com]

I think that the laid-back kinda dorky mute mermaid story = teh awesome.

Yes, we should get graycastle to write it. You're closer, you go first. SGA: Your Fandom's Crack Is Our Daily Bread, and Tastier, Too.

PS the 6th grade Distant Future of Fandom learned about Catal Huyuk in social studies class this week.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

if you really wanted to callback to songfic, you should've said Sarah McLaughlin or Celine Dion or something.

\o/ (http://cesperanza.imeem.com/video/q8Y2WmzM/speranza_sga_kingoftheworld/) ! My patheticness continues unabated!!!

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

I HAD FORGOTTEN ABOUT THAT

ILU

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

I'm just sitting here grinning at how far over the line I've now gone. I mean, okay, fine, I did amnesia and Ray the angry clown in my last fandom, but between the dolphins, the incest, the songfic, and all that, I really feel like I am PROGRESSING as an ARTIST. \o/

[eruthros]

And, since it is SGA, there will be no intervention! You'll say, okay, I've turned Rodney into an angry clown-dolphin having sex with his amnesiac brother John while listening to Celine Dion, and fandom will say: AWESOME.

[panisdead.livejournal.com]

we should start a new community like sga_storyfinders, only it should be rememberthe90s_storyfinders

I was going to say that we already have one, it's called my LJ, but I don't think I've read "A Fish Called Krycek" so I have to back out.

[eruthros]

Oh, man. Do you have half an hour? Because, really, it's a Formative Fannish Moment. It wouldn't look so weird in SGA fandom, but in XF it is HILARIOUS.

re: your journal, That is why we need a community! I agree with graycastle. No one fan can remember all of the crackfic of the nineties.

[panisdead.livejournal.com]

Never fear, I bookmarked it! ::g:: I have been trolling through sgastoryfinders a LOT recently, so I might...need a short break from Formative Fannish Moments (unless there's shunning. Is there shunning in this story??) but it'll get read.

[eruthros]

No, but I think Mulder gets fired! It's almost like shunning, except for the part where it was a plot point in essentially every X-Files story ever.

Also, I think that fandom also needs another community, which will be for commentary on sgastoryfinders posts. Like, people will rush to post "new winner for weirdest post ever!" and will go there to ask such questions as "hi guys, I've looked back in the archive for a couple months but I didn't see anyone ask for it. does anybody have a link to the sgastoryfinders post where somebody asked for Punk's story about John walking into walls but thought John was really being abused?"

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

....is the egg one for real?

[panisdead.livejournal.com]

I believe that's "The Sound of Wind Chimes," and I was SCARRED.

[eruthros]

*g* Dude, this is so nostalgic! In that way where I'm remembering all these hugely traumatic, scarring stories. This practically is that rememberthe90s community.

Quick, somebody ask for "Oklahoma" and we'll call it a day.

(Also, I provide a link to "Sound of Wind Chimes" for everyone's delectation.

[panisdead.livejournal.com]

I seriously considered dedicating my grad thesis to the authors of "Oklahoma."

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

...remembering old XF fic that I read when I was fourteen is a bit like TRIPPING OUT. I don't want the bizarre things in my brain to be real! There was the one where M&S go through a portal to an alternate universe that's all sword and sorcery, and Scully becomes a WARRIOR/HEALER, a previously unknown combination, and Mulder becomes a, whatever, GUY WHO DROPS HIS GUN, I forget, but someone reads their auras and tells them what they ARE. And then mostly I remember Scully fighting on horseback with her hair all grown out. OH ADOLESCENT FANTASY.

and the thing is, there are like a million XF and Buffy fics like these in my brain, just waiting for the right memory trigger to jump out at me! I am in grave danger.

[oracne.livejournal.com]

I READ THE WHOLE THING OF OKLAHOMA. Even with all the vomiting. And the blackouts and shivering in corners and not eating and taking drugs and all that. I kept thinking there would be less drugs and vomiting, but no. But I KEPT READING ANYWAY in incredulous fascination.

The non-vomiting parts were well-written, I recall. Great realistic cop-sounding cruel banter and gritty crime scenes. BUT THEN THE VOMITING.

[dremiel.livejournal.com]

Oh, Man! I was working for a huge State Institute of Higher Ed at the time and couldn't take the time to read it online but somehow managed to justify PRINTING it all out (on their dime, of course). I found the 4" binder with the whole thing about two years ago and chucked it out. I Should have saved it as an artifact!

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

ha! you beat me to it. man, I honest to god think that The Sound of Wind Chimes was the first (or one of the first) pieces of fanfiction I ever read in XF fandom. I was scarred also!

the best part was when the aliens sent them back to earth, and Scully had signs of having given birth (even though she hadn't been pregnant when she went missing, like, four hours before) and the FBI couldn't figure out what that meant, so just randomly charged Mulder with sexual assault. "Uh . . . she delivered a placenta with your DNA in it. You're a rapist? I think?" AWESOME.

[panisdead.livejournal.com]

I didn't remember that part! I actually don't remember it in ALL that much detail. Is this the same one where while they're captured aliens test their tolerances? Scully goes first and gets pain, so Mulder is all prepped for that but then they test pleasure? Then possibly he comes back and has sex with Scully, I don't know.

[dremiel.livejournal.com]

Eeek! I had repressed that memory!