Interventions

[eruthros]

So I was having one of those conversations you have with fannish friends. You know. thingswithwings was telling me a story idea, and she said, god, what am I even doing, somebody's gonna stage an intervention any day now. And I, of course, pointed out that this was Stargate: Atlantis, and that you probably couldn't get an intervention for anything less than "the story in which Rodney and John sit in the office all day without talking to each other and just do paperwork," and perhaps not even then.

So, guys, what does it take to get an intervention in SGA? How far do you have to go?

Like, imagine your fannish friend who's been with you for the last three fandoms. You even bailed out of the X-Files at the same time! It has been so wonderful and lovely. But now she's gone a little bit off the rails in this wild and crazy SGA fandom.

[Poll #1090767]

Comments

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

THE UNICORN/RAINBOW KIDFIC WAS A CRY FOR HELP

...not really. PS, I am writing Radiohead songfic RIGHT NOW, how did you KNOW?

PPS, there is no intervening in this fandom. we're past the point of no return, dude.

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

UH, excuse me, but as the author of both KID A and AMNESIAC, I TOTALLY have dibs here!

[eruthros]

I think we can be fair, here, you know! Divide up the Radiohead songs equitably. I'm sure that some arrangement can be worked out.

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

you have dibs on . . . cries for help? can you call dibs on that?

eta: I'm a moron. Amnesiac is a Radiohead album? I am bad at music! so, in conclusion, you win. ;)

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

Both Kid A AND Amnesiac are Radiohead albums!! You have clearly not spent enough time in the dark with your head in the oven listening to Radiohead and being EMO!!

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

*points to own icon* has John hum "...an airbag saved my life..." and passes out from weight of own emo-grief!

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

I feel the lack, believe me! I have OK Computer in a box somewhere, does that count? Also, does it count if I stick my head in an electric oven?

[eruthros]

No, of course it wasn't -- I know what was really a cry for help, but sadly, it is your story alone to tell.

ALSO, Radiohead songfic -- I just thought you seemed the type, dude. So I thought I would shame you here by calling it out!

Actually, maybe I should have said Evanescence. You know, "My Immortal" or something. Do you remember the Evanescence Vidding Period? I think it gets its own wave, practically. Like, third wave of vidding, 3.5 is Evanescence, fourth.

[graycastle.livejournal.com]

and yet, just above, I have demonstrated my ignorance of radiohead! I shame the nineties.

if you really wanted to callback to songfic, you should've said Sarah McLaughlin or Celine Dion or something. Remember that Spike/Xander fic where Xander was a secret cutter and always lit candles and spread out black silk before cutting his thighs and listening to Sarah McLaughlin's Surfacing? Because I DO.

(we should start a new community like sga_storyfinders, only it should be rememberthe90s_storyfinders or something, so people can be like, what was that x-files fic where Mulder and Scully were kept in an egg for a year and Mulder was forced to rape Scully to impregnate her and they kept hearing windchimes? or like, what was the due South fic where RayK was still getting beaten by his dad at 30-whatever years old and Fraser saves him and then they have healing sex? and then we can all be ruefully amused.)

[eruthros]

CLEARLY IT MUST BE DONE.

I mean, how else will I be able to point people to the X-Files story where Krycek's a mute mermaid with sharp teeth? Or where Scully hires somebody to rape Krycek to get him out of Mulder's life? Without googling, I mean, which seems like work.

Man, I totally should've said Sarah McLaughlin, but I have blocked out that part of fandom. I pretend it didn't even happen in dS canon, and that takes some doing. (REALLY black silk? REALLY?)

[cesperanza.livejournal.com]

if you really wanted to callback to songfic, you should've said Sarah McLaughlin or Celine Dion or something.

\o/ (http://cesperanza.imeem.com/video/q8Y2WmzM/speranza_sga_kingoftheworld/) ! My patheticness continues unabated!!!

[panisdead.livejournal.com]

we should start a new community like sga_storyfinders, only it should be rememberthe90s_storyfinders

I was going to say that we already have one, it's called my LJ, but I don't think I've read "A Fish Called Krycek" so I have to back out.

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

....is the egg one for real?

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

The only thing that would stop me from reading the nineties buddy cop movie fic would be that it is SGA, which I don't read. If it was in one of my fandoms, I would be all over it. (In fact, I think I have been all over it several times already.)

[eruthros]

To be fair, I usually summarize that genre based on a real Sentinel story that I totally loved, in a junk food sort of way. As I recall, on top of multiple kidnappings, brainwashed-to-be-an-assassin, etc, it also involved sensory deprivation and an infected tattoo. And was at least 300K. I mock because I love!

[veejane.livejournal.com]

Is now the time for a flashback to Life from the Ashes? Because I am pretty sure that Rodney has never turned into an ogre nor Ronon into a wizard, and I think that SGA fandom had better get cracking on that toot sweet.

As a bonus, all the women in canon are killed off in chapter 1!

[eruthros]

Rocks fall, all the women die?

I actually never read Life from the Ashes! Which is incredible, because I would read just about anything back in the X-Files. Unless it was just impossibly godawful, and even impossibly godawful was okay if I was bored.

I understand it to be one of those post-apocalypticish ones? Where there's, like, a huge alien virus thing and then half the population dies and then Mulder and Krycek get together for some reason? Over the course of 1000+ K?

[veejane.livejournal.com]

Viruses fall, and all the women who are not Scully die. (I do not think there was ever an explanation as to why she didn't die, except that she is Scully. Although, considering that it's her and 3 billion men on the planet, at least 2.5 billion of whom are inclinationally straight, I don't think she ever has sex again.)

So, the men not being afflicted with the virus, they start changing into various types, presumably to distract them from the fact that every woman they've ever met has died. Some are wizards, some ogres, some vaguely ghosty undead type of creatures, and Our Own Agent Mulder is turned into a rarity, some kind of pheromone-exuding sex-magnet perma-healing wonder. (There is considerable interest in the fact that, every time he has anal sex, afterward he "regains his virginity." I think this was written before the prevalence of Minotaur's sex site.) And then, all the characters (Okay, Krycek and Skinner) start fighting over him!!

It was a very long series of stories, so long I can't remember if I ever got to the end. But... ogres! And wizards! Fighting over a sex-magnet canon character (who weeps)! It's almost as good as the mythical (never read by me) Sentinel story about evil hyperevolved overlord cats who enslave mankind!!

[eruthros]

...

......

Um.

Okay. Ogres and wizards. Sex-magnet perma-healing weeping Mulder. Check. That sounds hilarious.

But, for SGA, I guess... WHY NOT. SGA could totally do that these days! As cesperanza says, we go there!

PS: I don't think I read the Sentinel story with the evil hyperevolved overlord overseer cats. But I did read at least a couple pages of the one where Jim was a panther-alien with a spikey penis, and Blair was being kept as a slave by Naomi who was probably a space whore or something and some guy she was into, and wore, like, gold chains in a cage, or something, and was twelve. And then Jim bought him. And events, I presume, unfolded. I think it was in a bazillion parts.

[dzurlady.livejournal.com]

writes an AU where John is turned into a mute mermaid with really sharp teeth, and Rodney is the trusts-no-one-guy who works at the marine lab
I'd read that! But then I have a terrible weakness for mermaid stories, far more so than unicorns.

[eruthros]

*g* A lot of the stories that were shocking in the X-Files are, as it turns out, hilarious in SGA fandom, and nowhere near the outer limits of SGA's crackiness!

Write something completely different...

[army-rat.livejournal.com]

that includes a slash scene where right in the middle of the action Rodney turns into a clown and John becomes a whale....

Re: Write something completely different...

[eruthros]

THAT WOULD BE AWESOME YOU SHOULD DO IT THE END.

/capslock

No, seriously. AWESOME.

[very-improbable.livejournal.com]

I...wound up here somehow or other, and you have broken my head with nineties flashbacks. Also, I want to see that mermaid!John AU. Also also, you left out "writes a story where John and Rodney declare their undying selfless love and affection for each other and perhaps there is also naked caressing and/or making out, but they ARE NOT GAY, THEY ARE JUST FRIENDS."

[eruthros]

HA. Yes. Not a lot of smarm left in fandom! Or at least, I don't see it.