The Mary Sue meme
Jun. 16th, 2004 09:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
eruthrosHow it works: go to ff.n and do a "search by story summary" for your name in either HP or LotR. Pick a Mary Sue or two to share the summary with everyone.
A girl named [myname] begins attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and makes some new friends.......... Mary Graham, the girl with the strange dreams and the hidden past, and Jake, the boy who's related to a hero.
This is a Grandkids of Our Current Characters story, so I'm actually Sirius's granddaughter. I think. For some reason Voldemort seems to still be around (maybe he's Voldemort's grandkid too!) and my dear friend Mary Graham has got some special talents that will make it better. Sadly, I'm sidekick!Sue, and I don't even get to sleep with anyone. *sulks*
[myname] Philips hasn't talked to anyone from Hogwarts in four years. She's about to get a letter that will change everything.
Marauders era! I'm Lily's best friend in the whole wide world, even though we haven't talked in years, and I'm James's sister! That's why they "pray" that I'll decide to attend their wedding. Again, I don't even get to sleep with anybody except some boring OC. *sulks*
Dumbledore needs a new spy who will pass Voldemort's scrutiny. [myname] needs a husband to keep her family off her back. Severus got Laurel, Remus is still courting Serene. So who is left to love, honour and obey (you wish!) but Sirius Black ... COMPLETE
Ooooh, this one's 17 whole chapters and has 253 reviews. Wow. Also, it refers to the author's previous Mary Sues, who are currently sleeping with Snape and Lupin. Poor Sirius got left until the sequel! Geez!
Let's see ... *skims quickly* ... Sirius is teaching what appears to be a class entirely on animagi as Professor White. And I wander in and promptly see through the charm that disguises him. Naturally, I hate his guts, because he played a Very Mean Prank on me. Clearly the story is still under revision, as here there's a placeholder of a Somewhat Inexplicable, Not At All Funny, And Not At All Mean Prank, but I'm sure the author's gonna fix that in a minute.
Anyway, that's not important -- what is important is that I need to get married or my evil cousin will remain my guardian my whole life, so I tell Dumbledore I'll spy on Voldemort for him if he'll arrange a marriage for me. I'm a perfect choice for the spying because Voldemort will be interested in my vast fortune, which of course I won't have access to until I'm married, so clearly it's got to happen right away. I don't think getting married to Sirius Black will make him at all suspicious, do you?
Interestingly, I was allowed to attend Hogwarts despite being a squib, but eventually my pureblooded parents gave up on me and locked me in their house so I would have the requisite unhappy childhood of the Mary Sue. This will of course make it very difficult for me to spy on Voldemort, what with the whole Apparation to his location and all, but I'm sure I'll manage. It'll help that Sirius will go to the Inner Circle meetings as my bodyguard, unless of course Voldemort thinks for a minute about my husband's name -- "Sirius White." Actually, I happen to be "A Healer" despite being a squib -- who knew that squibs could have talents like that?
And in this story I get to sleep with Sirius Black, which is... better than nothing, I guess. Even though I end up pregnant, which is very difficult since Voldemort wants to give me the Mark, which would kill my unborn child. Sirius finds the meeting, however, and takes the mark in my place. Then Voldemort tries to kill a DIFFERENT baby in order to carry out some nefarious ceremony. Fortunately, his plans are interrupted by the aurors; unfortunately, they arrest Sirius, apparently letting the rest of the Inner Circle slip entirely through their fingers in the process. In any case, it all turns out fine in the end, since Snape and Remus orchestrate a jailbreak and then Sirius proposes to me again, this time out of twoo wuv.
After [myname] Williams, a Gryffindor Chaser, is attacked, Oliver Wood feels responsible. At first he thinks that he is just staying by her side because she is his friend, but could it be that she is more to him? Please R&R!
Oooh, this has no plot but at least I get to sleep with Oliver Wood. Who might be skirting underagedness but so am I, so that's okay. Plus, let's face it, he is way cuter in a turtleneck than crazy Sirius Black.
*clicks on story* Hey, no fair! I don't get to sleep with him at all. I just end up in the medical wing and in a coma, and Oliver talks to me about how he likes me, but then it ends "OK, that’s all for now. If I get 5 reviews, I’ll write more. In the meantime, read what else I have written. Please review! Thanks. Bye." Harrumph. No chapter two with hot kinky sex? Geez.
This ff is linked to kristatwen's, we are writng them together. This is through the eyes of [myname], on Lily and James.
The author herself sums this story's Mary Sueness up best in her first paragraph: "[myname], was a seventeen-year-old witch. She had long blonde hair and hazel brown eyes. She has great best friends, Lily Evans, Kristine Lupin, Katie Black, Krista Potter and the ever-famous Marauders. It was her final year at Hogwarts and it was Graduation night. The friends were going out to celebrate. They were all Gryffindors."
In this story, I have to sleep with Lucius Malfoy. And apparently I like it. Urgh. Then I think better of it, 'cause he's a dick and won't acknowledge me, and go date Remus's cousin Chris Lupin instead.
Story of [myname] Grey, the only American accepted into Hogwarts. She has a crush on Sirius Black but someone could ruin her chances for love..... Starts at the beginning of her Fourth Year. This is my first fanfic so R/R but don't be too hard on me! :)
Marauders-era. The story is not finished, but I suspect I end up sleeping with Sirius Black. Again. (I could be wrong, but there are strong indications. For example, the summary.)
Severus loses [myname] in his youth and becomes a Death-Eater. What will he do when she finally appears and asks him to pay the ultimate price? Where will his loyalties lie? To Albus? To Voldemort? Or to [myname] and through her, the Malfoys?
This story seems to start in the middle of the plot, but I managed to work out that I'm Lucius's baby sister. And of course Snape became a DE for me, because he loved me so, but I vanished and so he has been without true love or any sex at all for ten years. This explains a lot about his temper. I don't know what the "ultimate price" is, or if we have sex, because it's a WIP, but based on my general knowledge of Mary Sues I project a loving marriage by the time this story is finished.
[myname] is new at Hogwarts, and instantly catches the eye of bad-boy Draco... But is he really that bad?
Um. Yes?
Anyway, I sleep with Draco until my crazy aunt tries to kill us. Yet another of the kidlets, and still no love for Ron or Harry! Aren't all Mary Sues supposed to get it on with Harry?
UPDATED! CH.6 UP! [myname] McClain is a normal teenager. She adores reading Harry Potter books. One day she finds a mysterious book that transports her to a place she never dreamed actually existed and she meets....Harry Potter?
Blah blah the Potterverse is real blah. And I don't get to sleep with anyone. AGAIN. What is up with these boring Mary Sues? *sulks*
Lily n' James dated for a bit, broke up, they hate each other now, blah blah blah! Now, it's up to James's lil' sis, [myname], her friends, and some Marauders to get 'em back with a series of outrageous pranks. Rowling owns it, not me!!!! {completed}
Matchmaker!Sue. And eleven years old. So I don't get to sleep with anybody. Other people's Sues get it on with everybody six times over. And I get to be a Precocious First Year. *sulks*
A old-ish and improved story by me, starring the lovely Oliver Wood and introducing (in first-person) [myname] D'Etoile, who after 4 years, finally is accepted by Hogwarts.
Wow. Look at my last name. Also? Although it doesn't say so in the summary, I'm actually American! Fancy that! And sleeping with Oliver Wood again. Getting a little boring, really.
This is the sequel to the strongest magic I posses- it cotains the story of how [myname] and harry reunite.
At first I thought this was going to be the proto-Mary Sue, and I'd get it on with Harry. Nope. I'm actually a Potter -- Harry's aunt. On the other hand, I get to be a DADA teacher! And sleep with Remus! Whee!
Wut would you do if you had the chance to be sucked into the world of Harry Potter, and try to save the life of Sirius Black? Well [myname] Woods is about to get that chance...
Best summed up by the author, again: "She gasped. Excitement though flooded her. She knew everything there was to know about the Harry Potter books! She practically had them memorized! And if Harry was only in third year...so many things hadn’t happened yet! So many bad things -- maybe she could somehow stop them from happening! And maybe, just maybe something she changed would save Sirius’s life in the end, by making Harry do something differently now! It was brilliant!"
Yup. It's time-traveling!Sue, out to save the world. Also, note the innovative spelling of "what" in the summary.
Plenty more, but my brain is scarred enough. Here endeth the Sues.
A girl named [myname] begins attending Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and makes some new friends.......... Mary Graham, the girl with the strange dreams and the hidden past, and Jake, the boy who's related to a hero.
This is a Grandkids of Our Current Characters story, so I'm actually Sirius's granddaughter. I think. For some reason Voldemort seems to still be around (maybe he's Voldemort's grandkid too!) and my dear friend Mary Graham has got some special talents that will make it better. Sadly, I'm sidekick!Sue, and I don't even get to sleep with anyone. *sulks*
[myname] Philips hasn't talked to anyone from Hogwarts in four years. She's about to get a letter that will change everything.
Marauders era! I'm Lily's best friend in the whole wide world, even though we haven't talked in years, and I'm James's sister! That's why they "pray" that I'll decide to attend their wedding. Again, I don't even get to sleep with anybody except some boring OC. *sulks*
Dumbledore needs a new spy who will pass Voldemort's scrutiny. [myname] needs a husband to keep her family off her back. Severus got Laurel, Remus is still courting Serene. So who is left to love, honour and obey (you wish!) but Sirius Black ... COMPLETE
Ooooh, this one's 17 whole chapters and has 253 reviews. Wow. Also, it refers to the author's previous Mary Sues, who are currently sleeping with Snape and Lupin. Poor Sirius got left until the sequel! Geez!
Let's see ... *skims quickly* ... Sirius is teaching what appears to be a class entirely on animagi as Professor White. And I wander in and promptly see through the charm that disguises him. Naturally, I hate his guts, because he played a Very Mean Prank on me. Clearly the story is still under revision, as here there's a placeholder of a Somewhat Inexplicable, Not At All Funny, And Not At All Mean Prank, but I'm sure the author's gonna fix that in a minute.
Anyway, that's not important -- what is important is that I need to get married or my evil cousin will remain my guardian my whole life, so I tell Dumbledore I'll spy on Voldemort for him if he'll arrange a marriage for me. I'm a perfect choice for the spying because Voldemort will be interested in my vast fortune, which of course I won't have access to until I'm married, so clearly it's got to happen right away. I don't think getting married to Sirius Black will make him at all suspicious, do you?
Interestingly, I was allowed to attend Hogwarts despite being a squib, but eventually my pureblooded parents gave up on me and locked me in their house so I would have the requisite unhappy childhood of the Mary Sue. This will of course make it very difficult for me to spy on Voldemort, what with the whole Apparation to his location and all, but I'm sure I'll manage. It'll help that Sirius will go to the Inner Circle meetings as my bodyguard, unless of course Voldemort thinks for a minute about my husband's name -- "Sirius White." Actually, I happen to be "A Healer" despite being a squib -- who knew that squibs could have talents like that?
And in this story I get to sleep with Sirius Black, which is... better than nothing, I guess. Even though I end up pregnant, which is very difficult since Voldemort wants to give me the Mark, which would kill my unborn child. Sirius finds the meeting, however, and takes the mark in my place. Then Voldemort tries to kill a DIFFERENT baby in order to carry out some nefarious ceremony. Fortunately, his plans are interrupted by the aurors; unfortunately, they arrest Sirius, apparently letting the rest of the Inner Circle slip entirely through their fingers in the process. In any case, it all turns out fine in the end, since Snape and Remus orchestrate a jailbreak and then Sirius proposes to me again, this time out of twoo wuv.
After [myname] Williams, a Gryffindor Chaser, is attacked, Oliver Wood feels responsible. At first he thinks that he is just staying by her side because she is his friend, but could it be that she is more to him? Please R&R!
Oooh, this has no plot but at least I get to sleep with Oliver Wood. Who might be skirting underagedness but so am I, so that's okay. Plus, let's face it, he is way cuter in a turtleneck than crazy Sirius Black.
*clicks on story* Hey, no fair! I don't get to sleep with him at all. I just end up in the medical wing and in a coma, and Oliver talks to me about how he likes me, but then it ends "OK, that’s all for now. If I get 5 reviews, I’ll write more. In the meantime, read what else I have written. Please review! Thanks. Bye." Harrumph. No chapter two with hot kinky sex? Geez.
This ff is linked to kristatwen's, we are writng them together. This is through the eyes of [myname], on Lily and James.
The author herself sums this story's Mary Sueness up best in her first paragraph: "[myname], was a seventeen-year-old witch. She had long blonde hair and hazel brown eyes. She has great best friends, Lily Evans, Kristine Lupin, Katie Black, Krista Potter and the ever-famous Marauders. It was her final year at Hogwarts and it was Graduation night. The friends were going out to celebrate. They were all Gryffindors."
In this story, I have to sleep with Lucius Malfoy. And apparently I like it. Urgh. Then I think better of it, 'cause he's a dick and won't acknowledge me, and go date Remus's cousin Chris Lupin instead.
Story of [myname] Grey, the only American accepted into Hogwarts. She has a crush on Sirius Black but someone could ruin her chances for love..... Starts at the beginning of her Fourth Year. This is my first fanfic so R/R but don't be too hard on me! :)
Marauders-era. The story is not finished, but I suspect I end up sleeping with Sirius Black. Again. (I could be wrong, but there are strong indications. For example, the summary.)
Severus loses [myname] in his youth and becomes a Death-Eater. What will he do when she finally appears and asks him to pay the ultimate price? Where will his loyalties lie? To Albus? To Voldemort? Or to [myname] and through her, the Malfoys?
This story seems to start in the middle of the plot, but I managed to work out that I'm Lucius's baby sister. And of course Snape became a DE for me, because he loved me so, but I vanished and so he has been without true love or any sex at all for ten years. This explains a lot about his temper. I don't know what the "ultimate price" is, or if we have sex, because it's a WIP, but based on my general knowledge of Mary Sues I project a loving marriage by the time this story is finished.
[myname] is new at Hogwarts, and instantly catches the eye of bad-boy Draco... But is he really that bad?
Um. Yes?
Anyway, I sleep with Draco until my crazy aunt tries to kill us. Yet another of the kidlets, and still no love for Ron or Harry! Aren't all Mary Sues supposed to get it on with Harry?
UPDATED! CH.6 UP! [myname] McClain is a normal teenager. She adores reading Harry Potter books. One day she finds a mysterious book that transports her to a place she never dreamed actually existed and she meets....Harry Potter?
Blah blah the Potterverse is real blah. And I don't get to sleep with anyone. AGAIN. What is up with these boring Mary Sues? *sulks*
Lily n' James dated for a bit, broke up, they hate each other now, blah blah blah! Now, it's up to James's lil' sis, [myname], her friends, and some Marauders to get 'em back with a series of outrageous pranks. Rowling owns it, not me!!!! {completed}
Matchmaker!Sue. And eleven years old. So I don't get to sleep with anybody. Other people's Sues get it on with everybody six times over. And I get to be a Precocious First Year. *sulks*
A old-ish and improved story by me, starring the lovely Oliver Wood and introducing (in first-person) [myname] D'Etoile, who after 4 years, finally is accepted by Hogwarts.
Wow. Look at my last name. Also? Although it doesn't say so in the summary, I'm actually American! Fancy that! And sleeping with Oliver Wood again. Getting a little boring, really.
This is the sequel to the strongest magic I posses- it cotains the story of how [myname] and harry reunite.
At first I thought this was going to be the proto-Mary Sue, and I'd get it on with Harry. Nope. I'm actually a Potter -- Harry's aunt. On the other hand, I get to be a DADA teacher! And sleep with Remus! Whee!
Wut would you do if you had the chance to be sucked into the world of Harry Potter, and try to save the life of Sirius Black? Well [myname] Woods is about to get that chance...
Best summed up by the author, again: "She gasped. Excitement though flooded her. She knew everything there was to know about the Harry Potter books! She practically had them memorized! And if Harry was only in third year...so many things hadn’t happened yet! So many bad things -- maybe she could somehow stop them from happening! And maybe, just maybe something she changed would save Sirius’s life in the end, by making Harry do something differently now! It was brilliant!"
Yup. It's time-traveling!Sue, out to save the world. Also, note the innovative spelling of "what" in the summary.
Plenty more, but my brain is scarred enough. Here endeth the Sues.
