(no subject)

[eruthros]

So. We were watching Troy, hoping it would be funny!bad, not just bad!bad. And I'm sorta half-paying attention as the Trojans all rush behind the city walls, and suddenly... llamas? And so I had to rewind it a bit, so m_shell could confirm it for me, and she's going "nope, those are donkeys... oh. no, those ones now, those are llamas." Two llamas, crossing the plaza of Troy. How's that for anachronism? Or maybe the art directors just... really liked llamas, and thought it would be a neat joke?

Also, Ajax is way too cool to be killed by Hector. Thus say I. Especially since he's the only one of 'em without the blessings of a god, and the one to protect the bodies of both Patroclus and Achilles so that that their bones can be commingled in their grave. Awwww. Though, really, Achilles doesn't deserve it. (Really, they're all idiots.)

Actually, the best part of this movie is Hector's "WHY am I surrounded by IDIOTS?" expressions.

Comments

[mecurtin.livejournal.com]

Two llamas, crossing the plaza of Troy.

I want a screencap of this SO BAD. But not enough to get the movie.

Actually, the best part of this movie is Hector's "WHY am I surrounded by IDIOTS?" expressions.

Well yeah, he does do that canonically a bit, but it's really Odysseus' line.

The only thing that would truly justify this movie's existence would be if they made the sequel. Starring Sean Bean's naked butt, as per The Odyssey.

[eruthros]

I want a screencap of this SO BAD. But not enough to get the movie.

Well, we haven't sent it back to Netflix yet -- no point, no mail on Sundays -- so I'll see what I can do.

The only thing that would truly justify this movie's existence would be if they made the sequel. Starring Sean Bean's naked butt, as per The Odyssey.

Yeah, but they could have done that without making Troy first. They'd just cast Sean Bean in the Odyssey! They wouldn't need to do this horrifying Orlando-Bloom-as-Paris, let's-give-Achilles-a-love-interest-that-isn't-Patroclus, by-the-way-did-we-mention-that-Briseis-kills-Agamemnon mess of a movie.

[casirafics.livejournal.com]

Oh, dear God. I thought I'd just read the same entry on my friendslist twice. *dies* penknife, from a few hours ago (http://penknife.livejournal.com/173937.html):

I suspected we would not make it all the way through Troy, but in fact we only managed about half an hour, during which artaxastra kept saying things like "But there was no Greek nation," and "But the city of Sparta isn't on the coast," and "That's very pretty Hellenistic armor. It's only about 1000 years off-period, considering that this movie is set in 1193 B.C."

It was very entertaining, actually, and it meant I got to see artaxastra yell "Llama! Llama! Llama!" and point at the screen in incoherent horror when a pair of llamas appeared, at which point I fell over and laughed until I couldn't breathe. We rewound to confirm the appearance of the llamas, at which point artaxastra felt that she couldn't go on.

I may try to watch the rest of it at some point, because I am morbidly curious about the plot, and I kind of like Sean Bean's Odysseus. But I think the llamas may have broken artaxastra. She just keeps saying "llamas!" with very wide eyes.


...I'm really not kidding.

[eruthros]

We really should have stopped watching at the llamas, because where do you go from there?

I mean, aside from differences from the book, it's hard to think of a funnier ooops! moment.

Oh, except for the time when Achilles leaves his tent at sunrise, all ready to sail back to Greece, and gazes over the sea. Into the rising sun. Note to filmakers who obviously have not in fact been to Troy: where is the sea? Oh, to the WEST. Where does the sun rise? That would be in the EAST.

Okay, and the fight scene between Paris and Menelaus, where their shadows point in DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS.

[choose-again.livejournal.com]

i rented Troy a while ago, after having recently read Dan Simmons' Illium and Olympos, which are historicalih scifi, and super awesome. well, this movie made my brain hurt a lot- but i missed the llammas! sadness! helen made me question whether or not that civilization was crazier than i thought- too much makeup and not much pretty, in my tastes. but yes, it was painful. luckily, you watched it with someone. i rented it on a boring alone night and was making commentary to myself. i had to say something! the p41n! :)